Ka-Ching!

1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player, Winamp, etc on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Put the artist after a dash following the song name.
5. Put any comments in brackets.
6. Tag some lucky people to spread the disease.

How would you describe yourself?
18 Days - Saving Abel

How do you feel today?
Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy - Big & Rich (I like things BIG & RICH)

What is your life’s purpose?
Slit My Wrist - Buck Cherry

What is your motto?
Drowning Face Down - Saving Abel

What do you think about very often?
Lost Without You - Robin Thicke

What is your life story?
Revolving Door - Crazy Town

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Party for Two - Shania Twain

What will you dance to at your wedding?
I'm a Bitch - Meredith Brooks

What will they play at your funeral?
New Tattoo - Saving Abel

What is your hobby/interest?
Gravity - John Mayer (I am trying to keep THEM up)

If you could do anything right now, what would it be?
Be Without You - Mary J. Blige

What do you want most of all?
Sexyback - Justin Timberlake (Mikey lives California)

What is your greatest fear?
I Remember - Keisha Cole

What is your darkest secret?
Daughters - John Mayer

What is your favorite thing in the world?
California Love - Tupac & Dr. Dre

If you could have one wish, what would you wish for?
Break Stuff - Limp Bizkit

What is your theme song?
Body is a Wonderland - John Mayer

The next time you hear this song (aside from now, that is), you must dance.
Suspicion - Tim McGraw

What will you post this as?
Ka-Ching! - Shania Twain

Completely Bored

So here I sit in front of my computer with NOTHING to do.... I have meetings set up and they don't start for another 45 min...

I thought that I would update you all since I am a really bad blogger and cannot seem to find the time to participate in blogging. Hmmmm Jeremiah started Kindergarten, got the first phone call from school yesterday and have you ever noticed that when you get the call and people on the other end of the phone state "Mrs. Anderson this is Harrison Elementary" you get that gut feeling and use your outside voice and say "What did he do?" thankfully enough all he did was get into an argument with a teeter totter and by the looks of his mouth the teeter totter won! thank goodness all of his teeth were intact. BUT of course the thought just crossed my mind of pictures are next week, and how cute would that be with his front teeth missing?
I will not be visiting my daughter this week she has previously asked if she could go with her friend for the weekend (she is 12 friends are more important) and so I am with "the pickle" he is at such a difficult age where I am not even sure how to respond to him, I think that he thinks that I like Mycalah better when in fact that is not true it's just that Mycalah communicates better, (she doesn't shut up) so I know how to talk to her and not how to talk to him... so any suggestions please feel free to contact me!
Back to work I go and wished this day would go by a lot quicker, I am going to Cali in the morning! yippee!!!!!!!!!!

PROVING THE BFF WRONG!

So my BFF said that she would be shocked if I posted something new. Well she is in luck the place I work for is closed this week except for our team. so ha ha I am bored to death. Good thing I have the rest of the week to have back to back meetings

There is a HUGE reason that I am writing this blog in this color it is so that BFF could comment back on "OOH It's Green, Yep It's really GREEN" So that maybe she will forgive me for the Green comment I made on her bathroom, Which is completely beautiful with the white accessories. It tones the green down A LOT!

As most of you know I travel to California every 3rd weekend of the month, I was the "Disneyland" Mom for the first year and than suddenly noticed the change in the attitude with the children as soon as I stopped. So we have decided to go and start swimming at Mike's sisters... Personally I love it and have a great time

I know that non of this makes any since BUT I only did it cuz BFF said I wouldn't ha ha

Royal Caribbean Commercial POSTED BY LIFESESCAPE.COM

Royal Caribbean Commercial POSTED BY LIFESESCAPE.COM

The exact behavior of the wonderful 12 year old daughter on vacation!

Royal Caribbean Commercial POSTED BY LIFESESCAPE.COM

The exact behavior of the wonderful 12 year old daughter on vacation!

The wear and tear that children do

The wear and tear that children place upon your body is not nice! physically and emotionally, I have not posted on my blog the entire time my children were here on vacation, I would have loved to share the moments as they were happening BUT my sweet "12" year old daughter has the office/bedroom when she stays, if you have read my blog before than you know of the trials and tribulations that I went through when I didn't know where my children were. So in short! WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING??????????/
ahh the love of a 12 year old girl who screams at her Mom (because I wouldn't let her eat on the couch that night for dinner ) so quickly goes to her room and slams the door and proceeded to announced that she is calling her dad and telling him that I am starving her. Quickly (she got my attention) she received her food in her room and didn't come out for the rest of the night, I also told her NO cell phone for the rest of the evening except to phone her "PARENTS" ( her dad and step-mom) but to her they are her parents, so what does the smart 12 year old girl do? she sits on the phone for 2 hours, yes I said 2 hrs with her "MOM' (are any of you hearing any resentments here) complaining how she is home sick and Needs to come home, ah yes it is only the beginning of the issues you may have with a tween girl in your home.

I have this friend that I work with who remains to be anonymous and the fact that she has her masters in parent education called to see how I was doing with the 3 kids at home, as I was speaking to her the wonderful children decided to engorge themselves on otter pops. after about the 8th one for each I finally started to yell, (I am a yeller & remember the parent educator on the phone) I threatened them with an inch of their lives, and yelled for them to put the otter pops down put their hands in the air and step away slowly. My friend quickly began to laugh at me and stated "You actually parent quite well" as I was shocked and flabbergasted my daughter chose to take down my 8 year old son, and proceeded to beat the crap out of him while I was on the phone, I am sure you can all think of what I was going to do next, yes yes threaten them that I would duct tape them to a tree in the back yard. It didn't work,

A couple of days later I took my 12 and 8 year old to the dentist 1st time EVER (their father is too busy spending money on cruises to Alaska and Motocross races) we discovered that the 12 year old needed 2 rotten teeth pulled, and the 8 year old needed 12 cavities filled and 1 tooth pulled, OK here's the horrible parent part, after they were pulled my daughter was curled up in a ball on my lap at the dentist crying for her Dad it took everything in my body to not say "well if your Dad would have taken you, you wouldn't be going through this" that would be called self control right there, after a few days they both wanted their teeth that were pulled so that their "Parents" could have them, they whined and cried and carried on, (by this time I usually give in) BUT!!!!!!! I was quite done with the situation and finally stated to them that since "I paid for the teeth I am keeping them"

There are many many conflicts that happened with them all, I am no longer feeling guilty for not being with them I am actually feeling sorry for them that they are not being brought up (this is my opinion and perception for how they treat me) with respect, gratitude, and great fullness. I don't know if its them, or if it's me, or what, Yes we have a lot to learn about each other, but respect is something that I am going to insist on.

I would like to say that all in all it was a wonderful warm and fuzzy vacation ( um yea I am totally lying) BUT it was hard, it was difficult, frustrating and I cried every single night that they were here. The hardest thing was to listen to them call their parents and tell them over and over and over again how they missed and loved them. I know it's going to take some time and understanding but I would give anything in the world for them to say it to me once, just once. I am heartbroken, and have this feeling in my heart and gut that I don't even have a word for.

Yosemite

As most of you have seen the commercial about the girl on the cruise and how the family is looking for just a glimpse of the smile! and ahh but yes I have had the pleasure of going through that personally, I am absolutely convinced that the girl must be 12, although I am sure that My daughter didn't behave that way on their cruise to Alaska this summer, NO she just behaved this way due to the hiking, the climbing and dealing with 2 younger brothers and camping at one of the most beautiful places in the country YOSEMITE! I was able to go to the park when I was a kid and felt compelled to share these moments with the children. Boy was I wrong, needless to say I had a very much of a "Mommy Meltdown" in the middle of the Yosemite parking lot, thinking that nothing is ever good enough for my 2 middle children, I never felt so unappreciated in my life, I constantly tell them that "I am the Poor Parent" I can not afford cruises, I can't afford expensive things, what I can do for them is try and teach them that not everything in their life has to be Flashy or have the Look at Me attitude,
I want to teach my children gratitude, grace fullness and respect, I know that they are confused and angry for what has happened in the past, and at first I felt guilt, and ashamed, But those feelings are gone gone gone, I don't parent with guilt anymore, I don't spoil them and try to buy their love back I truly understand that they are young but they will not run me over with a Mack Truck no longer,

Men and Fireworks!

Well as I went on the adventure in seeking out the greatest thing (to a Man) explosives! Have you ever noticed that when you buy Fireworks and men are around they have to make them "BETTER?" It is quite amazing how they look at the great TNT and instantly become an adolescent again, It is a wonder that they live to become adults, As being married to one of those I will make it a better fire work husband I love it it brings out the inner-child with in him. He does have safety precautions it is "Everyone stand Back" This year I will have my children with us for the 4th of July and how great and wonderful it is. They live in California and they don't get to have the fun and excitement of blowing things up. *that I know of" I do feel that all little and big boys should have the opportunity to fire off their own Roman Candle's. Whether we are Adults or Children the fascination of fireworks still makes us all Ooh and Aah about them, we make fun and say ooh and aah about certain thins but yet we still do it.

The adventure of going and getting took an entire Saturday as I held my little one Jeremiah, and 2 friends to Washington hostage in my mini-van and listening to everything from Keith Urban to the Pointer Sisters I have to say they were all good sports, We were like 3 women and a baby on the hunt down for fireworks in the great state of Washington, We traveled all the way to Kelso, 40 miles up the boarder. we stopped at every single tent warehouse and tried to find an Indian Reservation, I even so much ed asked someone in their car with complete headdress and feathers hanging out of it "where are the Indian reservations? they must have gotten a little chuckle from me and stated "were from Oregon" I thought to myself "your in Washington with complete Native American Garb hanging out of your car and blasting Native Music and they can't tell me where a location is?" So I found out that Washington changed the laws this year on would not start selling fireworks until the weekend of the 28th. The problem with that is I will be in Cali picking up the children. As I depressively drive back to the state of Oregon we make a call... I did achieve my goal in making my children "actually husband" very very happy from getting the good old fashioned products of TNT through as I call it "home girl shopping network" ooh yeah the greatest day to blow things up Independence Day will surely be a blast.

Poverty in America

OK I never blog 2 times in a week let a lone 2 times in one day, But I can not let it go about the poverty in the USA.

Poverty

I have never posted a video so I didn't get to say that stuff about how I felt to much about it, I think it all goes back to my drug addiction and how I am great full that I never had to live in the great poverty of most people, It is also the reason I sent my children away from me so that I didn't have to put them through living on the street. Most families that are on the street are not as lucky as I was/am that I was able to ship the children off. I was also one of the lucky ones who only had to sleep on the streets one night out of my entire addiction in Martinez, Ca.. If any of you know about the East Bay in California you know that there are some beautiful homes in that town, But than again there of course is a downtown ( next to the jail) and that is where I was, scared, out of my mind and not knowing what to do...
OK back to the Poverty piece, I learned out and about in the Bay Area that a lot of the families are not on drugs, they are just down on their luck, as you see a person on the corner try not to think of them as drug addicts think of them as someones, Father, Mother, or someones child.. we all think of them as why don't they get a job, why don't they live with family members and why don't they go to a shelter, well How are they suppose to get a job with out an address? how are they suppose to be with family if they have none? and the homeless shelter? are usually full and like Mary and Joseph there is no room at the Inn.
I am not asking for anyone to give the man on the corner any money or the women in the wheelchair. I am just asking for people to look at them in their eyes and tell them Hello,

Learning to survive

For a little over 2 years now my great and wonderful provider, best friend and husband has been working in California, I have never been married to a man who makes sure that he does this for his wife and son so that he can have a roof over our heads and food and of course clothes. I miss him terribly and wish that he was home more often, But I have to look at the positive things about it.. I have learned to deal with a flat tire, change a light bulb and take the trash out.. all of those things that we "Expect" out of the men in our lives.
People often ask how do I do it? the summer before last I just about had a nervous break down do to it, so one day I remembered this news cast when I was living in Illinois and heard of this place called "Cabrini-Green" housing in Chicago. as I was watching this documentary about it, I hear of it being one of the most infamous places in the united states, as the News caster was interviewing an African American women with a baby on her hip and 4 other ones around her stating that she is doing her best to keep her children educated, off the streets from gangs and not selling or using drugs, this women of inspiration worked 3 jobs and tried to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads with no man in her life to help out... and yes I know that poverty is everywhere in the United States and it is a rough job to raise children, I am greatly saddened about how America has the commercials of "Feed the children" of all the 3rd world countries other than the United States.
As I read articles of the housing projects today and how they are changing the neighborhoods and getting rid of those apartments to try and better that area of Chicago. I will never complain about how I don't have my Husband home, I don't have this and how I don't have that. This great man in my life, is Mike.... he has taught me to love again, he has helped me get reunified with my own children and he has never complained about having to work out of town. Mike in a way saved my life by telling me one day that I always said "if I had a place to get clean and sober I would" Mike offered that opportunity and I took it. for that I am forever in debt.

The greatest things in life are;

The greatest things in my life by far are my children;
I have 3 boys and 1 girl
Each one as you read have some sort of me in them, after not seeing or hearing or even not knowing where they all were at one time in my life (due to my own stupidity) I often think of DNA and think WOW they are my children.

Boy number 1 ooh actually Man #1 "Jim Justin Jordan II aka "J" tall handsome and RED hair, I was 19 when I had him and boy how life changing that was. he is my only one with Red hair, he is tall like his Dad he has my eyes and his fathers nose, he enjoys music like me and his Dad, he is a wonderful mixture of his father and I. He is smart and brilliant with music, and will be graduating next year. I made the mistake of getting into drugs heavily and I have not physically seen him since he was 9 years old. I am sure that he has a lot of questions for me but the only one I could answer is that the best thing I ever did for him (which I am not sure if he will agree) is I sent him to his aunt and uncles in Utah., he has since moved in with his Dad and Step Mom, and I will be forever great full for raising such a talented and intelligent young man.. If I could guess who and what The fascinating J will be when he is older? It will be a Musical Conductor, anything that has to do with music a producer , a musician anything he wants to be

ahhh child #2 the talented singer Miss Mycalah Anne Zapper aka "stinkerbell", age 12 I see how she is and her behavior is freakishly like mine. she won't eat sea food our Motto is "If it's from the sea it's not for me" she doesn't eat meat on a bone you know only chicken breast boneless and skinless, she walks like me smiles and has the same facial expressions, (it's quite creepy) we keep staring at each other and I am sure the same thoughts go through our minds. She Miss Mycalah will go up and be a scientist that sings. For Mothers day weekend we all traveled down to California for her singing competition this was the first Mothers day in so many years that I have spent with them , She didn't tell me that she had a solo in the competition and to my surprise there she was singing "I am just a small voice" she is petite and she is growing into a beautiful young lady. ooh and by the way she'll kick your butt at the drop of a hat!

# 3 Dyl pickle who got his name from the older siblings. Dylan Patrick Zapper he is testing, he is unsure of who I am. he is at the ripe old age of 8 who will soon be 9. I don't blame him for being weary about who I am. I mean come on, I think the last time I saw him he was 2 years of age, he has questions, he is uncertain but he is coming around, we are learning a lot about each other, he is the spitting image of my father with the ears and all. he has his fathers personality, and my temper. Julie their dad's fiance is who he calls Mom, he asked me one day if he could call me "Mother" and all I could think of was the Pink Floyd song so we decided on Momma .He also loves music the child has rhythm and wants a drum set, after great deliberation between his father and I we have decided NO! he has a wonderful talent of making people laugh, he is my sensitive one (if he reads this when he's older I am sure I'll never hear the end of it). He will be a professional dirt bike rider, or an author due to how much he reads.

and #4 the surprise of my life., after only having 6 months clean Jeremiah Michael Anderson aka "Bull Frog" , came into my life in a flash. he grew in my heart and not in my tummy for he is Mike's bio-logical son, I have had the great pleasure of raising him since he was 6 months old. at the time he was born I had no idea where my other 3 children where they could have been in Asia for all I knew, I didn't know how to live life with out a child to raise that is why I stuffed feelings with drugs. Jerem has been a great challenge, he was born drug-effected he has taught me patients he has taught me how to speak up for children who are in great need of special needs. He is the complete dare devil he has no fear except for the dark, he just graduated from pre-school and is getting ready for kindergarten. if I could guess what he will be when he grows up it would be a "stunt man"

for all my children I love them each and everyone, I love how they all have different personalities I fear my children, and still question if they like or even love me for what I have done, I work as a contractor for child welfare today and my job is to help mom's with drug and alcohol problems get their children back from the foster care system, each and every day I tell my story over and over again in hopes that just one mom will get it before it's too late,

When I was going through the custody battle with Mycalah and Dylan's Dad, I was so ashamed for what I had done, I faced humility, fear, and emotions that I have not brought up for years, someone had told me once that my children will be adults longer than children, BUT I don't care, I want them to be children, and by the grace of God I haven't missed out on High School or College graduations, marriages, and Grandchildren, The greats amends I can do for my children today is staying clean and sober, be present, and I will always love them unconditionally.

TODAY MY CHILDREN WILL NEVER SEE ME LOADED AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Brand New Couch for Sale

The couch, well I don't write much on the blog, probably because I work 40 + hrs a week and I am chasing an ADHD child around my house until 8:00pm, and by than I am tired, But the adventure started on Friday where I had a good friend sad and depressed so after work, I went to her farm and made her Peet's coffee (if you know coffee than you know it's the best) any who, I thought that it would be fun to go to an auction with her last night, ooh let me start from yesterday afternoon, I went to pick up the kiddo at Grandmas house and I stated "when are you gonna get a new couch in here?" I really like it it's beige and micro suede and pretty, (of course not for a 4,8,12 year old kids and a husband) but it's pretty, she said not for a while, OK back to the auction, I was under the impression that it was going to be farm equipment, which it was, and low and be hold the couch, there it is, beautiful and brand new, I raised my paddle thinking I was going to be out-bid, how could this lap of luxury go for only (not that much)????? how? any ways obviously I won the couch, NOW comes the hard part of telling the husband who has no idea what I have done, I called him as soon as I got cell phone coverage and tried to explain to him I bought a couch kind of a Christmas, Birthday, Valentines Day, and Mothers Day gift all rolled into one, He is extremely attached to the Hide-a-bed we already own, of course this is not a hide-a-bed, I have some resentment towards this situation, due to if you have a penis you usually get what you want, Say a portable heater for Christmas, some candy for Valentines day, a really great dark chocolate egg from See's Candy for Easter ( i know what your thinking not much BUT it's the thought that counts) and ooh yes, the new 20" flat screen TV with DVD player for the Motor home. I guess this is a pitty party I am having for myself, does anyone want to join? OR does anyone want to buy a couch? by the way the couch in the picture is exactly like the one I bought?

MOTHERS DAY WEEKEND

I have cried and wept, over my children calling someone else Mommy, and as I have prayed and felt guilty (over that one) I was introduced this weekend to my children's, friends, teachers and choir coach as their REAL MOM nothing could have prepared me for this, I have to say that God works in mysterious ways and that he works on his own time not Lizzie's time, what more could as Mom want? I thought that was the greatest gift of all, My daughter had a choir competition this weekend and she surprised me with a solo it was beautiful, she is the next American idol, she is awesome and I can not say enough wonderful things about her,

The Pickle, that is what we call Dylan, he has finally got it through his thick skull that he is not the bottom of the pecking order in our home, he is at his dad's but not with his mom, poor Jeremiah has no idea whats in store for him, Dylan was "bored" waiting around for Mycalah's comp. and so he thought that he would antagonize Jeremiah by telling Jeremiah to close his eyes and than Dylan proceeded to hide, and run away so that Jeremiah could not find him, and yes he was NOT playing hide and go seek, Dylan didn't want to be sought out, we had to remind Dylan that Jeremiah is only 4 and yes you are bigger than Jeremiah and why are you arguing with a 4 year old about who's bigger? That was the argument for 3 days! yes count them 3!

we went to Six Flags Discovery Kingdom with all the people who were in the choir comp. MISTAKE!!!!!!!!! and it was my husbands 42ND b-day (not happy) So even though I had the 8 year old picking on the 4 year old and the 42 year old complaining all day about money and how the world is going in to a depression and not a recession and the 12 year old who wants to hang out with her friends and not her Mom (it's the age) it was the best Mothers Day I could ever have! If for some unforeseen reason I died today I would be happy my life is almost complete, I am just waiting for the day that I spend time with Jay my 16 year old, I have a perfect life what more could I ever possibly ask for?

to all of you out there in cyber space HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

Ahh the short of the story

Ok so to make the long story of my life pretty short as short (as 16 years of using, 2 ex husbands and 4 children later) I didn't see Mycalah (My -kay-la) and Dylan for almost 6 years , I sent my oldest to his dad's at age 9 and now he is 16, and shipped Mycalah and Dylan off to their grandparents in Vegas, why you asked? because their dad went to prison for manufacturing, yes manufacturing he thought that he could be in pharmaceutical sales. So I was deep into my addiction and had nothing left to loose, I am going to get somewhere in this story of mine, I have yet to see Jay my oldest he lives in Austin TX with his wonderful Dad and can't say enough nice things about his Step-Mom. On June 16th, 2007 I was reunited with Mycalah and Dylan, I found out where they were due to the fact that I was still married to their Dad! whoops did I tell you that I am married to a fabulous guy names Mike? ooh didn't get that far yet. so yes I broke all the rules of life, will get back to that drama later too. So Jeff sent me divorce papers and thought that I would sign relinquishment papers so that his fiance could adopt them I am sure that he thought I was still using, and whoops he's about 3 1/2 years too late at that time, why because I am a contractor for Child Welfare what do I do? I help mom's regain custody of their children when they are in the system. So they were not to happy with what I have done in my life. LOL LMAO I can never tell that story enough. I still get a great chuckle out of it. I love flashing my Child Welfare Badge, especially to them. So now I go to California every 3rd weekend in the month I drive 9 hrs to get there on Friday and spend 8 hrs on Saturday and drive home on Sunday that is my life I drive 18 hrs to spend 8 hrs with my children, ( I am sure it pisses Jeff and Julie off) that I have been very accountable and have never missed a visit yet oop lie, I missed in January due to the weather. I will do anything for these children.
SO back to what I am getting at is that I had my children home here in Oregon for Christmas Break for 10 days WOO HOO, they called me Mom, the best present anyone can ask for, I call them every Sunday faithfully at 7:30 PM to talk to them (this is where I am going with all this blah blah) They don't call me anything when I talk to them on Sundays ( every now and then they call me HEY) they act like it's a chore to speak to me, they dread talking to me on the phone, I can hear it in their voices, I don't understand, I am not offended that they call Julie Mom, heck she's been there for them more than I had in the past, I just want to be called Momma they can call her mommy I am the Momma, I had them for spring break we had a great time I even put them all in time out for fighting, Dylan asked if he could call me Mother, all I could think of was Pink Floyd, I kindly answered the question of you call Julie Mommy and me Momma, I think thats fair,
I want them to treat me the same way on the phone as they do when they are with me with love, and respect. yes they are probably confused and angry with me for what I did and I carried that guilt around for YEARS, but as I have worked steps with my sponsor I no longer feel guilty the best thing I did for my children was I loved them enough to let them go to someplace safer than being with me. I don't know why they treat me weird on the phone, I just don't understand it SO if anyone could possibly give me some answers to this freaking question I would be greatly appreciative.

Self Destruction

Should I start from the beginning? well I was born !!!! LOL as you well tell I will be quite comical through this "Blog" thing y my BFF Maraiya has turned me out on this new addiction. Which brings me to the "Self Destruction" title, I was a major Meth addict for 16 years!!!!!!!!!! minus the 3x being pregnant and nursing (hence the 38 longs). you hear of all of those people with the missing teeth and horrible skin, me on the other hand have most (as you see the word most) of my teeth I do have all of the front ones, and my skin never looked as great as it did when I was using. I guess you could say that I was a lucky tweeker. I have been arrested, sent my oldest with his father and the other 2 with their grandparents. The husband at the time went to prison for manufacturing meth. to make a long story short, I used and used to numb the feeling of the lose that I had in my life and yet I am a responsible women in recovery and do not blame anyone but myself, so to make the long story short I got clean originally in may of 03, why did I get clean? I really didn't like going to jail and having helicopters and police chasing me down in a car that I "Borrowed" thankfully by the grace of God, I didn't have any major charges waiting for me. and decided that I was done.

Ok end of (as we call it in recovery) war stories. I have no idea what compelled me to share the fact that I am a recovering Meth addict to the enitre world wide web where thousands of people could just read it on a whim, I guess it's to share with others that We Do Recover